Darryl Bellamy Jr. Encourages RPS Students to Fear (Less)

Rutgers Prep had the pleasure of welcoming speaker and author Darryl Bellamy Jr. to campus this week to share his approach for managing fear and anxiety with our Middle and Upper School students.

Bellamy, a self-described ‘fear collector,’ has delivered his high-energy presentation to students across the country, showing them not how to be fearless, but how to fear less.

At his speaking engagements, Darryl asks the audience to write down their fears on note cards. To date, he has collected and read over 70,000 fears, including those from RPS, but one thing was clear from the beginning: while we often feel alone in our struggles, many of us share the same worries as those around us—a fear of failure, of not being good enough, of disappointing loved ones.

Bellamy’s message focused on the idea that fear isn’t something to eliminate altogether. Instead, he sees it as a protective emotion, one that, while essential, can hold us back if left unchecked. Through practical strategies, he challenged students to make use of his three-step process–Trace, Embrace, and Grace–that involves sharing fears, taking action despite them, and being kind to themselves along the way.

Offering examples from his own life, Darryl spoke about moments when he faced fear, like running for student body president in college and losing by just 19 votes and leaving a safe and stable job to pursue an uncertain career in public speaking. Each risk, he noted, didn’t lead to regret but to growth.

He encouraged those in attendance to ask themselves, "What if it goes well?" rather than focusing on the worst-case scenario. He pointed to studies showing that most fears never materialize, and when they do, they often provide valuable lessons or aren't as bad as we initially think.

Darryl concluded with a gift for our students, his signature "fearless" wristbands, a reminder to have fearless moments every day.

Thank you to Darryl Bellamy for sharing his insights with our community and to the Health and Wellness department for organizing the event!